From Fr John
Be still my soul: the Lord is on thy side
In my first year of seminary, I remember the Rector said ‘transitions can be messy’. The transition could be starting something new, like being a first year, or it could be coming to the end of a chapter of one’s life, like the sixth year who’d shortly be ordained and leave the seminary. As I look at my study, three days from departure, the Rector’s words that transitions are messy ring true!
Amidst this ‘messy’ transition, as I move from this parish to my next, I have been looking back over the three years. I give thanks that due to my time here, I now walk with more confidence, more peace and more joy as a priest. This has come through the encouragement and guidance of the Holy Spirit, from the joy and patience of Fr Anthony and you, the good parishioners of St Thomas. From early on, indeed in the first week of being in the parish, I was aware that the parishioners at St Thomas were very much aware that a freshly, newly ordained priest is by no means the finished article and that the care and concern was going to be mutual between priest and parishioner.
One of the blessings my new parish priest will unknowingly enjoy is that he will only have to answer a small percentage of the endless and probably tiresome questions I asked Fr Anthony when approaching my first Sunday mass, my first baptism, wedding, Christmas etc. My growth in confidence, peace and joy in being a priest is in no small part due to the patience, and resilient joy, of Fr Anthony.
In the past three years my growth in confidence, peace and joy has also been a result of seeing that God is with us and that I can put my trust him. The words of the hymn ring true: ‘the Lord is on thy side’. In passing through small (and at times seemingly insurmountable) obstacles, in my time here and previously, I have seen that he does sustain me and travels with me. At times I would have appreciated a slightly smoother road to travel, or more help. However, even in those times, I have learned and seen that he travels with me, sustains me and is on my side. I have seen this to be true through illness that has come the way of my own family this past year. I have also seen it to be powerfully true in the lives of parishioners. In numerous situations, I have been amazed, humbled and encouraged by the perseverance in love, faith and trust in Christ — despite the great storm in a parishioner’s life or family. I have also seen that their trust and faith in Christ has seen them through, and brought them to calmer waters and greener pastures. One of my sadnesses, in leaving, is knowing that I leave when a number of parishioners (and no doubt many unknown to me) are still travelling through a storm, and have not yet reached the calm reassurance of the seashore. Know that I continue to pray for you and that the Lord is on thy side.
In the stained glass window above the high altar, the life of St Thomas Becket rotates around the edge of the circle — with, in the middle, the pelican feeding her chicks by drawing blood from her breast. In a way, the pelican is the anchor and driving force, moving St Thomas Becket’s life from birth to martyrdom. The pelican is one of the great images of the Eucharist. Just as the pelican draws blood to feed her young, Christ feeds his flock through his death on the cross, bringing new life to hungry souls. This powerful image of the Eucharist at the centre of our church has been a strong reminder to me that our true anchor in life is Christ, truly present in the Eucharist.
In the Eucharist, we see Christ victorious over sin and death: so we have no need to despair in the face of sin or death. In the Eucharist, we see Christ on the cross, so we have no need to question our infinite God-given worth; we have no need to question if we are known or loved. In the image of the pelican feeding her young, we are reminded that Jesus is truly present — body, blood, soul and divinity — in the Holy sacrifice of the Mass. So we know he is with us until the end of time; the Lord is on thy side.
My prayer for you, therefore, is that you treasure the greatest gift we have been given — Christ present in the Eucharist — and have this as the centre, summit and driving force of your life. With Christ present in Eucharist at the centre of your life, you will continue to grow in confidence, peace and joy as you walk with the living and loving God, until you reach your eternal rest in the promise land of heaven. Likewise, please pray the same prayer for me.
Fr John Howard
